Minding my mindfulness in the New Year

 

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Mindfulness seems to be the buzzword of the day. It had been calling out to me here and there, when coincidentally, a mindful friend gave me a book about the art of watching birds, mindfully. Reading the book has been pleasant so far. Turning the pages makes me feel relaxed and calm, because the author's tone and the subject matter are relaxing and calming. It is also making me want to be more mindful, not only in bird watching, but in other aspects of my life. 

        The dictionary compares mindfulness to awareness. I already consider myself to be aware, or mindful, especially of my surroundings when out and about, but there are times when I am not mindful enough. 

    So, at the beginning of January and the start of a New Year, I resolved to be more mindful, partly because of the book given to me, and partly because being consciously mindful seems like an excellent idea. If I am more mindful, maybe I will not make as many mistakes, at least, that is a partial intent in seeking to be more mindful. 

        Only two days into January, despite my mission of mindfulness, I made my first big flub, because I was not mindful enough. I baked a chocolate pie for a friend's birthday, and when I sliced it, syrupy chocolate filling ran onto the plate. I should have baked it longer. If I had inspected it more carefully when taking it out of the oven, I would have known. Instead, I trusted a note from long ago that I had baked it for thirty-five minutes, failing to take into account that a new oven had been installed since then, and that different ovens deliver different results. Next time, I will be more mindful.

        Mindfulness is a two-way street. There are times when our mindfulness is overridden by someone else's mindlessness. No matter how mindful we are, mindfulness and mindlessness sometimes collide. 

        Several years ago, I was driving my car when I saw another vehicle up ahead and to my right, about to turn onto the street. Seconds later, I heard a thud and felt a jolt, as the driver rammed the passenger side of my car. She had not been the least bit mindful. 

        I pulled over and parked on the side of the road, called 911, and waited for the police. When the officer arrived, a good Samaritan/witness, who had been driving behind me and had seen the whole thing, gave him a statement on my behalf. 

        The errant driver's mindlessness caused a lot of trouble for me. I was summoned to appear in court and had to have my car repaired. If only she had been more mindful ...

        A short time after that, as bad luck would have it, I fell victim to another's mindlessness. 

        I was at an intersection waiting to make a U-turn when a rear-ender knocked me forward. "Not again," I sighed. With dread, I exited my car to survey the damage. The careless driver, a nicely dressed young man in his twenties, was getting out of his car. He asked if I was okay. I told him, "Yes," but that I needed to check the bumper. The young man asked me again, "Are you sure you're okay?"

        A bystander had called 911, and when the policeman arrived, he told us to move our vehicles out of traffic and exchange insurance information. The young man and I discovered we had both been on the way to Bed Bath & Beyond across the street, so we donned our cars again and drove to the parking lot. 

        The young man sat in his car for a few minutes, then he walked over and handed me an envelope on which he had written, in fine penmanship, his name, address, phone number and insurance information. He asked a third time if I was alright. Then he showed me his insurance card, so I could compare the written information on the envelope with the printed information on the card, even though I had made no such request. Although he had been mindless a few minutes before, the young man proved to be mindful now.

        After finding no dents in the bumper, I thanked him for the information, and as we ended our conversation, he said in a friendly voice, "I might see you inside the store." 

        While I shopped, I noticed him perusing merchandise in the aisle across from me, and I thought how nice a young man, even if he did run into my car. Driving home that day, I reflected on how proud his parents must be of their well-mannered, considerate son. One driver rear-ending another could have been an uncomfortable situation, but the young man's presence of mind, or mindfulness, compensated for the inconvenience.

        Much time has passed since those accidents. I remember little about the woman who crinkled my car, except for her big sunglasses and a spiel about having a reaction to medication. But Ben, the twenty-something young man, stands out, and I still have the envelope he gave me. His mindfulness after the bump-up made up for the mindlessness that caused it. Mindfulness leaves a lasting impression.

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